The foundation of holding a safe space, like we do in our Men’s Wellbeing retreats and men’s circles, is having some agreements and values that set the tone for how we all show up.

The PROVIDER Codes don’t just define how we walk on our retreats, they are a transformational reminder for showing up as a good, grounded man in today’s world.

Presence - bring your presence, show up, use eye contact, listen, bring all of you, open your ears, your eyes, your heart. Turn your phone and any distractions off. If we’re in an online circle, don’t be doing other stuff! The best thing we can do as men, is be present for those around us.

Reverence - Speaks to the heart of the word Provider. Nature is our Provider, we’re constantly in communion with it, so walk lightly on this earth. Recognise anything all nature as a living, intelligent being and only take what you need. Just like we walk on this earth, we have reverence for women, in our talk and actions. Reverence is intertwined in the principle of Katiakitanga or guardianship, to be a katiaki first we need to feel and acknowledge this sacred connection.

Ownership - Take responsibility for your choices, current state and position in life. Don’t blame others. Take action and when something needs doing, own it. You are the master of your own ship, so take the wheel.

Valor - Lead from the heart, and have the courage to keep your heart open when it hurts. The courage to lean into hard discussions. The courage to do hard things daily that build your resilience. The courage to set boundaries and say no. And the courage to speak up when you know something is not right.

Integrity - Integrity is about aligning your values with your actions. Aligning your walk with your talk. Approach life and your relationships with honesty. Choose your words wisely, and speak the truth. Integrity means not being judgemental because we’re more concerned with our own actions than criticising others. Integrity means staying that path and not compromising our core values to get a quick result.

Discretion - Any personal information someone else shares is CONFIDENTIAL and PRIVATE and does not leave the group. Loose lips sink ships. When you leave a retreat, circle or call, use your discretion to share any new found wisdom, because not everyone is ready for it. The best way to show or teach others, is to do the work to embody what you have learnt and lead by example.

Expression - Use this opportunity to express yourself, and your feelings. Tell others how much you appreciate them. Express the gifts that you have been given in this life, don’t hide them away.

Reciprocity - Step into the mutual exchange of energy and the power of the collective. You get what you put in. Give without expecting to receive, but be open to receiving in return.